I cannot tell you the compassion I have felt for all your sufferings for these weeks past that you have had so many drawbacks. Funny was that I couldn’t say je t’aime and je t’adore as I longed to do, but always remember that I am saying it, that I go to sleep thinking of you. It was so inadequate to try and tell you what it meant. Eleanor Roosevelt to Lorena Hickok (Eleanor’s long-speculated lover):Īh, how good it was to hear your voice. It is a lovely place and lacks only you but go to Salisbury first. Why are you alone in London, and when do you go to Salisbury? Do go there to cool your hands in the grey twilight of Gothic things, and come here whenever you like. I know Hyacinthus, whom Apollo loved so madly, was you in Greek days. Your slim gilt soul walks between passion and poetry. Your sonnet is quite lovely, and it is a marvel that those red rose-leaf lips of yours should be made no less for the madness of music and song than for the madness of kissing. Oscar Wilde to Lord Alred “Bosie” Douglas (Wilde’s eventual muse): I’d like to paint you, but there are no colors, because there are so many, in my confusion, the tangible form of my great love.į. I ask you for violence, in the nonsense, and you, you give me grace, your light and your warmth. All this madness, if I asked it of you, I know, in your silence, there would be only confusion. To feel myself trapped, with no fear of blood, outside time and magic, within your own fear, and your great anguish, and within the very beating of your heart. Truth is, so great, that I wouldn’t like to speak, or sleep, or listen, or love.

I woke up this morning with great bliss of freedom & joy in my heart, Bill’s saved, I’m saved, you’re saved, we’re all saved, everything has been all rapturous ever since - I only feel sad that perhaps you left as worried when we waved goodby and kissed so awkwardly - I wish I could have that over to say goodby to you happier & without the worries and doubts I had that dusty dusk when you left… - Bill is changed nature, I even feel much changed, great clouds rolled away, as I feel when you and I were in rapport, well, our rapport has remained in me, with me, rather than losing it, I’m feeling to everyone, something of the same as between us.

What happened to him in Tangiers this last few months? It seems he stopped writing and sat on his bed all afternoons thinking and meditating alone & stopped drinking - and finally dawned on his consciousness, slowly and repeatedly, every day, for several months - awareness of “a benevolent sentient (feeling) center to the whole Creation” - he had apparently, in his own way, what I have been so hung up in myself and you, a vision of big peaceful Lovebrain… When Bill came I, we, thought it was the same old Bill mad, but something had happened to Bill in the meantime since we last saw him…but last night finally Bill and I sat down facing each other across the kitchen table and looked eye to eye and talked, and I confessed all my doubt and misery - and in front of my eyes he turned into an Angel! O Heart O Love everything is suddenly turned to gold! Don’t be afraid don’t worry the most astounding beautiful thing has happened here! I don’t know where to begin but the most important.

Just as long as you love me font